I know, it’s been a hot minute since I last blogged! Do people still say hot minute…?! If they don’t, I have already hit post on this and its too late to take it back. So, lets just roll with it shall we! Usually, I can cram my posts into the 2200-character max for Instagram, but this post was just not physically possible. Trust me I tried!
Random fact about me! I never felt like I have belonged to many things in my life. I was mostly an outcast and while yes, that sounds sad, it is all I ever really knew and did find solace in my solitude. Would it have been great to belong to more things – probably, but I usually felt like I was on the outside looking in on most people, places and things.
Through lots of therapy and just the chain of events we will call my-life, I now have a deep understanding as to why I was an outcast, however that revelation and explanation is for another time and day. Because that my friend, is not a short story!
What all of my outcast-ery-ness taught me (yes let’s pretend that is a word), was that it is okay to not belong to something and it is also okay to loosely be part of many things too. We as humans are multifaceted like that and despite what society tells us, we can be more than one thing and feel many things all at once, all at the same time. They can even contradict themselves! Thoughts/feelings are just crazy like that – now throw in motherhood and GIRL! – contradictory moments/feelings/thoughts are a daily experience!
Motherhood has this ability to stipe us clean of our once known identities and can leave us utterly confused at the stranger we see staring back at us in the mirror. While growing into a new version of ourselves should be amazing and soft, it usually begins to happen ever so quietly during the newborn stage when we are in the trenches, sleep deprived, hormonally catastrophized, healing from pregnancy/delivery all while learning to take care of an entirely-dependent-bundle-of-love we now call our child. There is not a lot of softness happening at this time… and that can leave holes and gaps within ourselves with next to no time in our daily schedules to fill/patch them up.
Upon entering into motherhood, I began to hear fellow moms labelling themselves in all of these different categories and I began to learn that there were groups within motherhood. Types of moms and women who confidently stood with these as their label too. Which I thought was great because feeling like we belong to something can bring so much comfort especially from the many isolating aspects of being a mom.
But again, I never really felt like I fully belonged to any of them specifically because while I agreed with some aspects, I usually never fully resonated with them entirely. There were times when I felt like I should identify as a certain type of mom (if I could even figure oh what that fully meant to identify as), but labelling myself has never been a strong suit either. I just recently figured our who I am for the first time in my life (like within the last 4 years), so asking me to give myself a label would have been impossible for me to even comprehend let alone do! What I did do however, was take what I liked about each mom-type and incorporated that into my daily mom-practice where I saw fit.
So, you are probably wondering, what are these mom-types you speak of? And I am sure you have heard of most of these! And while it took me a while to research them, these are the most common ones I was able to find and define.
Disclaimer** If I got any of these wrong (specifically one you identify with), this is not a jab at you, this is only for educational purposes only.
Some of The Mom-Types are as Follows:
Crunchy Mom
Loves all things natural & organic. She’s got cloth diapers, homemade baby food, and DIY remedies, & has a soft spot for essential oils.
Silky Mom
The opposite of a crunchy mom. She prefers convenience & modern solutions like disposable diapers, store-bought baby food, & mainstream medical care.
Granola Mom
Similar to crunchy moms but with an emphasis on an outdoor, eco-friendly lifestyle. She’s the mom who’s happiest camping, hiking, or growing her own food.
Helicopter Mom
Always hovering, making sure her kids are safe & on the right track. She’s deeply involved in her kids’ activities, education, & social lives.
Free-Range Mom
The opposite of a helicopter mom. She gives her kids a lot of independence, encouraging them to explore and learn through experience with minimal interference.
Gentle Parenting Mom
Focuses on emotional connection, empathy, and respectful discipline. She encourages open communication & understanding her child’s emotions deeply.
Tiger Mom
Strict & achievement-oriented. She pushes her kids to excel academically & in extracurricular activities, with high expectations & structured discipline.
Pinterest Mom
Creative & crafty! She’s always planning the most elaborate birthday parties, DIY projects, & themed family activities that look straight out of Pinterest boards.
Working Mom
Balancing career & motherhood. She’s often juggling work deadlines and school pick-ups, but she’s a pro at managing her time.
Stay-at-Home Mom
Focuses all her time on raising her kids, managing the household, & often taking on a lot of behind-the-scenes work to keep the family running smoothly.
Cool Mom **Que mean girls scene
She’s the fun, laid-back mom who is friends with her kids & their friends. She’s got the best snacks & a knack for keeping up with pop culture trends.
Fit Mom
Focuses on health, fitness, & an active lifestyle. She’s often seen jogging with a stroller or squeezing in a workout between school drop-offs.
Crafty Mom
Loves DIY projects, arts and crafts, and turning ordinary moments into creative masterpieces. Her kids’ school projects always win the day!
Spiritual/Zen Mom
Practices mindfulness, meditation, & maybe even yoga with the kids. She believes in positive energy, inner peace, & raising kids in a balanced environment.
Perfectionist Mom
Obsessed with doing everything “right.” Her house is always spotless, her kids are in perfectly coordinated outfits, & she thrives on order.
Hot Mess Mom
The mom who’s always running late, covered in baby spit-up, or juggling too many things at once. She’s real, honest, & laughs at the chaos.
Boy Mom/Girl Mom
Boy moms are often wrangling wild energy, bugs, and dirt, while girl moms might have an abundance of glitter, princess costumes, & drama. But either way, they embrace their role!
Sports Mom
Always on the sidelines cheering for her kids at every game. Her weekends are filled with practices, tournaments, & snack schedules.
Social Media Mom
Her Instagram is curated with perfect pictures of her kids, family vacations, and #blessed moments. She loves to document her life online for the world to see.
Minimalist Mom
Keeps things simple & decluttered. She avoids excess toys and clothes, focusing on quality over quantity in her household.
So while some of you had no idea any of this was a thing, some of you may see your mom-type listed and strongly resonate with it, and others may feel upset (or left out) that they have never felt like they could belong to any of the types and it has bothered you more than you have wanted it to… OR you have been trying to be a certain type but you don’t actually want to be that way but feel pressured to. Motherhood is full of so many damn pressure points!
For me? Well… I am sometimes Crunchy, sometimes Silky, sometimes Granola. I try to be Gentle often, with a solid dose of Spiritual/Zen but there are days those all go right out the window. I would love to be more Pinterest/Crafty or Fit but my schedule makes these insanely hard to not only do but to do well within them. So, I usually reside within the Hot Mess zone with a sprinkle of the above where it works out and just hope for the best on any given moment. Will my mom-type change, probably! I grow and change alongside my children!
So, in the longest story-not made short, the whole purpose of this was to say, its okay if you are a certain mom type and confidently stand in your role, it is also okay if you don’t fully fall into one category type, and its still okay if you only like some aspects of some of them and you just do your own thing. There is nothing wrong with being one or the other or a mixture of a-z. It is okay to be an intuitive mom, where you just do what feels right – minus the label AND its fully okay to take on a label and it be a strong part of your identity. You are allowed to be whoever you want as a mother and that powerful choice is, and always has been in your hands.
This diversity is what makes motherhood unique for every individual and through our differences is what makes it all so much more beautiful. We are actually allowed to be different from one another. And I don’t know if you realized this but no two moms are exactly alike.
Just be whoever you want to be mama!
That is the only person who your children will ever need! Don’t worry what someone else is doing and just follow what feels right for you and your family.
Because that is all that truly matters.
Alight, if you made it this far! Congrats! You Get a Gold Star!
If no one has told you this lately, you are an amazing mom, doing an amazing job!
Keep it up!
Love & Light
Jodi
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